First time crying in dialysis (7/6/22)

First time I broke down crying today in dialysis. My legs cramped up for the second time at the end of the session. While I was writhing in pain trying to fight the cramps from taking over, I saw a fellow dialysis patient being wheeled into the clinic on a stretcher. He looked very sickly, incapable of walking on his own. A flood of emotions took over: anger at my body, sadness for my situation, and questioning how and why I ended up at the same place as him when our bodies and capabilities are so different. Probably want to throw in the word hopeless.

I see morbidly obese people every day that clearly do not put fitness or nutrition first yet they have functioning kidneys. Makes no sense to me. It’s like a non-smoker getting lung cancer. But these things happen. Luck of the draw I guess.

I should be thankful that I’m able to mostly function normally and that my body isn’t in a dilapidated state but the severity of my situation continues to settle in daily. I hope that none of you end up with this awful disease but the reality is some of you will. That’s why it’s of utmost importance for you to Get Your Blood Checked